Saturday, August 25, 2007


The boys started school this past week. My babies are getting older. It's a sad fact that I've had to face.

When they were little, I heard so many negative comments about how things would be as they got older. "Just wait until they're teenagers" I would be told, as if they were enlightening me with a terrible omen. It always bugged me, and I would always reply back in a most positive fashion, explaining how I look forward to seeing them grow into amazing men. I don't want to look at my kids' maturing as a bad thing. I feel like if I pray, and pray, and pray some more, I might get enough wisdom to raise my kids to be patient, loving, kind, humble, etc. I'm seeing some of that fruit already in my kids.

I'm realizing that I have to pray more and more lately. I'm stepping into a stage in Jacob's life that is new to me. He's in 4th grade now, maturing, growing, and acting more like an adult than a kid. When he was a toddler, it was easy for me. I knew what I needed to do as a mom. Now there are emotions, actions, and reactions that I'm taken aback by. There hasn't been anything bad...just unexpected at times. I first noticed it when he started to talk about one particular girl in his class. He talked about her a lot! After a while, he shared with Michael that he had a crush on her. While the fact that he had a crush was sweet, I was kind of sad. No longer were girls being seen as "just a kid in my class". He says he doesn't like her anymore, and he doesn't talk about her as much, but I know this won't be his last crush.

Jacob has started to care a lot about what he looks like too. Gone are the days when we have to nag him about showering. It's his idea now. Gone are the days of bed-head. His hair has to be perfect. And gone are the days of shopping for clothes without him...he has an opinion about what he wears now. Things have to be cool. Styles have to be upheld. He even has to carry his backpack to school in a cooler fashion, with only one strap being utilized.

His sense of humor has matured greatly. He's always been very witty, but I've noticed an amazing growth in that area. The things he jokes about are more thought out, more relevant. He can add more to conversations than he ever has before. Along with that, I've noticed that less gets by him too. He will notice little things that only grown-ups might catch. Watching a movie the other day, he noticed a tampon joke and asked what it was, and what it was used for!


All of this growing and maturing has caused me to pray more and more for wisdom. I find that my kids don't need me as much as they used to, and I'm having to adjust to that emotionally. I know it's a part of raising God-loving, strong, independent, productive adults. That is my goal. I never assumed it would be easy for me to let them mature, but it's still taking some adjustments on my part. I don't want to smother my kids, but I want to be there for them when they need me. I want to be a parent they can come to with questions. I want to be honest about life to my children. I want them to grow up knowing that they can talk to their parents about anything, and we won't spin a tall tale in reaction. In doing that, I'm having to really think long and hard about what's age appropriate, and what the best way of going about imparting wisdom is. I've realized my first reaction is to find a book to consult, and I find myself asking: "What would Dobson do?"

James Dobson got me through the toddler years with books and programs about anything and everything toddler. He'd have creative ideas for discipline, activities, and how to show your kids how much God loves them. He's been a great resource for my early parenting years. Now that I'm in a new stage, I'm having to search differently. As Jake grows into a pre-teen, I'm realizing that I'm relying more on my instinct than what Dobson would do. You know, I think I may be maturing and growing too.